It's 4:14am and what else do I have to do? nothing but fucking Livejournal. Nothing much has been gifting my life these past weeks... and the stuff that did, I've already forgotten about. My birthday was... relaxing? (a nice way of saying 'boring'), Skinny Puppy was amazing in ATL, GA. We got press passes and got to take photos all up close and such. I spent over 3 weeks in Charlotte, went up there when Kenny moved out. I don't remember much else... My days are starting to blend together, I don't even keep up with what day it is. and I can't help but find myself wishing to get hit by a speeding car every time I cross the street. I like my coffee black now, when it's cold I wish for nothing flavorful. 4:23AM. I feel numb... from the heater not being on? or is it because I'm just too tired to feel anything. Nothing feels real anymore. I can't find my meds. I'd kill for Xanax. I have lost all my love for any type of music, the noise just hurts my ears. I have 4 huge cuts on my arm from my stupid ass dog. I'm out of anything to smoke.

and this cold is going to be the death of me.


FML.